10 things I've learned about myself

I was having a philosophical bubble bath the other evening. No, that is NOT the name of a new kind of bubble bath ... as far as I know. I think the bubbles were green tea and rose, or something like that. Anyway, I was soaking away a stressful work day, sipping a glass of wine, thinking about life in general, and came up with a list of things about myself that I found a little surprising. So here's the list ... I'm baring my soul to y'all:

#1: I'm a cheerful and optimistic person. People actually comment on my happy smile! It's a genuine smile, too ... not a mask to hide what's really going on underneath. That wasn't always the case. There was a time when I woke up in the morning, my first thought was "SHIT! I'm still bloody alive!" and I truly wished that wasn't so. Upon reflection, I can't remember the last time I cried out of fear, frustration or anger.

#2: I have ZERO tolerance for cigarette smoke and smokers. Which is a wee bit funny considering I smoked myself in my mid-teens. Okay, mostly because Gramma said I wasn't allowed to, and we all know saying NO to a rebellious teenager often results in instant rebellion. Over the years, I have found myself more and more disgusted with the smell of smoke and the mess of butts left behind by smokers. These days I'm damn near militantly assertive about it!

#3: I have extremely low tolerance to heat. Even my bubble bath was in cool water, thank you very much! It's a funny thing, cuz I was raised up in the Okanagan Valley, so you would think I would love heat. I tan really easily ... unusual for a (former) redhead, so I don't need to avoid the sun. I just hate heat! I can't think, can't function if I'm too warm, and this is 24/7. And no, it's not "power surges" ... those fortunately aren't happening anymore.

#4: I avoid fat-free foods. I don't worry about my weight, although I'm far from skinny and maybe ought to. It's just that I see labels with the words "fat free", and I start wondering what scary chemicals have been added to replace familiar fats like butter. If I think about the big chemical words on labels, I actually get nauseous and gag! When I tried to think where this started, I recalled a dish of low-fat ice cream that ... for some strange reason ... I didn't finish eating, and left sitting out overnight. The next day, IT STILL LOOKED LIKE A DISH OF FROZEN ICE CREAM! That's just not right! In fact, it's downright CREEPY! When I read the label, there were many big chemical words, and I've been leery of low-fat and fat-free foods ever since.

Side note ... did you know it's really difficult to find yoghurt that is NOT low-fat/no-fat???  And sour cream??? 

#5:  I like to wear plain-coloured tops.  I am not confortable in print tops, although sometimes I like print skirts or dresses.  Half of my closet looks like a rainbow because I organize blouses, teeshirts, sweaters, etc by colour and shade.  I wear colours according to whatever mood I'm in, and print tops are too confusing.  For ambivalent days, I can choose from 14 different white blouses or tee-shirts!

#6:  I really like being a student.  I LOVE learning and studying.  I miss classrooms!  I'm extremely happy making notes, reading, researching, writing papers.  I even love teaching ... making lesson plans, lecturing, marking papers.  I would say I'm in the wrong line of work, but I actually get to do all of those things as part of my job.

#7:  I do not understand jogging / joggers.    All that sweating, wearing spandex, sweating, torturing feet with running shoes, sweating, inflicting stress/pain on feet and knees, and sweating ... did I mention sweating? ... DELIBERATELY truly boggles my mind!  I don't mind running to catch a bas, or hurrying to get something specific done, but I really don't like to run or hurry without a clear destination and purpose in mind.  The actual running/hurrying is NOT a destination or purpose to me.

#8:  I like languages.  I like the sounds of different languages.  I'm fascinated with the history/evolution of different languages, as well as the connections between languages and cultures.  Idioms ... oh what fun!  And sentence structure ... amazing!  Oh!  And gestures that go with words ... wow!  I wish I had enough lifetime left to learn every language on the face of the earth!

#9:  I like trains.  Seeing the Via Rail train at the train depot (which I pass by on the way to work every morning) leaves me feeling restless and "itchy" for the rest of the day.  I've only been on a Via Rail train a couple of times, but I want MORE!  Maybe this stems from growing up beside the railroad tracks and waving to the engineer every time a train went past.  I really enjoy the sound of trains rumbling along.  Some people find this noise very annoying, but I find it extremely soothing.  The sound of a distant train lulls me to sleep very quickly.  If I'm already asleep when the 11:00 pm train leaves PG, I wake up enough to hear it, smile, and drift back to sleep smiling.

#10:  Watching clouds moving across the sky grounds me.  I still clearly remember the first time I noticed clouds moving across the sky ... I must have been 4 or 5 years old ... and how that sight clarified for me that I was s small part of something much bigger, and that the world ... my world ... was unfolding as it should.  I think that was my first "spiritual" exprience.  Any time I feel a little frazzled or uncertain, I just have to stand still and watch the clouds move, and everything falls back into perspective for me.

Well, that's my list.  Anyone else care to share????